


Red Swan

by Cillo89



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Xenoblade Chronicles X
Genre: Betrayal, Character Death, Character Study, Crossover, Irina's brother, Not Canon Compliant, Secrets, Song Lyrics, Titan Shifters, Tragedy, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:27:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27828961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cillo89/pseuds/Cillo89
Summary: In a war against the relentless Titans, there are humans out there who, in their singularity, define what humanity does best.
Relationships: Elma/Her dead lover, Hope Alanzi/Murderess





	Red Swan

**Author's Note:**

> This is an AOT/SNK x XCX crossover oneshot.

They relish in the small instances of rest they can get. The apparent tranquility is frightening to some, but most are used to it. The castle isn’t busting with life, on the contrary, it’s a slaughterhouse and they are all waiting for their turn. It’s the feeling of imprisonment they’ve always known. Being trapped in the Walls is something. They all know the threat of the Titans lies around them, all around, but the Walls are safe. They have kept humanity safe for ages. There is nothing to fear inside the Walls. But there, in the basement of this ancient castle, they shiver at the thought of leaving. Exiting the Walls is exhilarating, it’s a liberation. It’s being called by the sun and the wind, it’s flying between the trees like birds.

They barricaded themselves inside. They needed to make their presence so discreet that Titans wouldn’t smell them, so they went as deep as possible, climbing down endless stairs to give the wounded some rest for when they’ll go back to the city. Their situation may seem dire, but they have a protocol. They always have a protocol. Their hierarchy hasn’t been shattered either: the Commander is surveying their stocks, the squad leader is ensuring everyone’s calmness. The other squad leaders perished, blazing a way forwards for their subordinates so they could find shelter from the Abnormals.

“I don’t want to die…”

The deafening silence in the room is interrupted by a broken sob.

A young, dark-haired woman breaks down, lets herself fall against the brick wall. She starts to sob uncontrollably, hardly soothed by the friendly hand rubbing her back. She is lost in her despair, and that demotivation is the cancer which ruins troop morale. The most impressed of them, the youngest, the _children_ , they look at her like bovines, as if struck by the sudden awareness of their condition.

The squad leader knows from experience how such outings end. To her dismay, some other kids tear up, hugging themselves. Kids from the other squads, mostly. Kids who have seen their captains with limbs bitten off. Some start to shake with desperation.

Before the situation can derail further, Elma’s voice booms in the basement:

“Soldiers, line up!”

The kids tense. They all stand up on command, as if by instinct, so Elma can’t help the smirk at seeing these well-trained pets. They look like scared dogs during a rainstorm who begrudgingly listen to their master, wagging their tails expectantly, even in the face of danger. They line up in front of her in three rows of ten soldiers, keeping their backs straight and their right hand over their heart. Their other arm is strictly locked against their lower back. Some shake a bit, still. Elma is hardly touched.

“Tonight, we will separate in two groups. The first group, composed of my squad and Commander Nagi’s squad, will keep guard for half the night. Everyone else, _go to sleep_. I am not to hear a single noise from any of you until it’s your turn to watch the camp. Any questions?”

A blonde girl raises her hand. Elma recognizes her, she used to be a part of the 60th training squad. Elma was familiar with this squadron, because the man who ensured their training was an acquaintance of hers. Elma nods in the girl’s direction, who seems surprised to be acknowledged.

“Mia, ma’am. I want to ask, what is the plan tomorrow?”

“That will be addressed in due time. For now, worry not about things you have no control over. No further questions permitted. I want you all fresh and ready when it’s time to switch. Group 2, at ease. Go rest up.”

Half the kids relax. Some turn back to their friends, some don’t have friends to turn back to anymore. Elma decides not to pay them any mind for the next twenty minutes. If they extend over this limit and still haven’t put themselves to bed, she’ll have to do it herself. For now, she figures out how to place the group on watch. She needs to have her most proficient elements next right outside of the room where everyone sleeps. There would be nothing worse than rebels among them. She needs someone trustworthy to alert her in case of disturbance.

She faces the remaining soldiers with scrutinizing eyes. There is a dozen of them before her, still tense, keeping their posture rigidly. Not all of them are new recruits. Veterans like Irina and Frye parade around with trained confidence. She picks them out of the lot and orders them to guard the common room, where the hushed whispers have started to die down. The others are placed strategically as well, so that, in the end, every corridor, every possible exit, everything apart from the Commander’s chamber is watched. Elma needs as much security as possible – they all need this security. Watching their own ranks wasn’t above them, she must bring back most of them alive. The Survey Corps need the manpower, and they have lost so much in a single day already.

Half an hour after her speech, she finds herself wandering the corridors to talk with the Commander. She taps her breast pocket subconsciously as she walks on, pressing a hand to her breast pocket, in which an emblem lies. She stops the motion immediately after turning a sharp corner, entering the corridor where she stationed Irina.

“Ma’am.” The subordinate greets. “You seemed tense, earlier.”

“Irina. How are they holding up?” She does not pick up on the comment.

“Some are crying. Some are silent, which is arguably worse. Some others are being brave. The usual, captain.”

Irina says it with a strained voice. _The usual_.

“Your brother. Is he okay?”

“Still recovering from the shock of seeing his captain killed, ma’am. Nothing he can’t overcome, believe me.”

Elma knows how dear Irina’s brother is to her. Family is treasured more so than friends. Friendships are shortlived. Friendships aren’t encouraged. Soldiers should always be aware that their colleagues, their comrades, could all die before their eyes. They were all trained to know that, one day, they’ll see their superiors, their subordinates, their closest teammates, die. Devoured by titans.

Elma remembers the commotion when Irina learned about her brother joining the military. She has known Irina since the woman was a cadet and, as a matter of fact, has sometimes been partnered up with her for training. Irina is skilled, Irina is merciless. But most of all, Irina is caring. Elma has been fascinated the first time she had seen her interact with her brother. Nothing short of compassion or understanding, she was and still is a sweetheart to her family. This duality in her, if Elma even dared to call it duality, when she knows humanity’s situation pushed most of them into this sour, bittersweet mindset, was endearing. It was how she kept herself grounded. She needed to be the shoulder her brother would direly need, and so she has. With time, she grew to accept her brother’s choice but keeps a close eye on him on every mission they take part in together.

“And you, Irina?”

“Ma’am, what with the questions?” She lowers her gaze and shakes her head a bit. “I am aware of the war we’re fighting and of its implications. I know casualties are inevitable. It won’t make my convictions falter.”

Elma is perplexed but does not let it show. She reminds Irina to notify her should turmoil arise, then takes her leave. She tries to keep her mind busy with Irina’s situation, but her own worries rise up, like bubbles under water, her thoughts threaten to boil until explosion. She won’t let it come to this, but she has also yet to find a healthy alternative to her problems. To the words she hears endlessly, to that voice haunting her nights. Ignoring them has made her no good, accepting them has been a long and difficult road, but she has done it, yet their incessant presence always puts her on edge. What more can she do?

She listens to them.

And she walks on.

“This is bullshit”, Mia complains. “What are we stationed here for? We’re closer here to the outside world than anyone else. Titans could smell us…!”

The young woman sighs and plops down. She ogles her outfit to tighten some of the leather straps further. As her fingers work through the locks and buckles, she hums a tune unfamiliar to her guarding partner, whose eye twitches as she starts to sing off-key.

“Stop that.”

“Shut it, Yelv. Or sing along!”

“How did you survive that long out there already…?”

“Hey, watch it! The captain trained me personally to catch up with you lot! I’m plenty capable.”

Yelv crosses his arms over his chest and looks away with indifference. That gets Mia to roll her eyes dramatically. She sighs for the umpteenth time and scratches her blond head frenetically, soon imitated by Yelv, whose hair, thicker, is full of tangles.

“You’re stationed here because the captain doesn’t want anyone to bust out of here in the middle of the night”, Sharon tells them with a disgusted look on her face. “Yelv, you disgust me.”

“What now, you prick? Get back to licking Hope’s boots. What are you here for anyway?”

“It gets boring in the other rooms. They’re all hushing each other because they’re scared of Captain Elma. Not like she can hear us from here, huh?”

“You’ve come to talk to us?” Mia exclaims with a kind of naïve hope only she could pull off. “Aww, I knew you had it in you to be nice!”

Sharon tsks but sits down close to them nonetheless. She has a knee up and lays a hand on it, seemingly living a stress-free life. She looks towards the corridor she herself came from and arbors a bored expression.

“You’re not the worst persons to be bored with, and Alanzi’s in the other group anyway.”

“She was under Bozé’s orders…”

“That’s right. I was there when the Abnormals came.”

“What happened?” Yelv’s is soft, for once. He looks down, arms still crossed over his chest. He leans against the stonewall behind him, his gaze lost somewhere on the floor.

“Oh, it wasn’t a pretty sight. Not a pretty fight either. One Abnormal came from under the ground and one of the soldiers got crushed by their horse when they fell down. The blood alerted the surrounding titans, so Bozé fired the smoke signal. He barked orders at the recruits, but you know, he had the youngest ones. Their lot panicked, they broke the formation and the titans overwhelmed them easily. Then, we saw the Commander’s signal that indicated northwest. We rushed there, but Bozé wasn’t keeping up with us. Don’t get me wrong, the old man was an idiot most of the time, but this time around, he outdid himself. Good thing it was hist last, huh? He stopped his horse in front of the horde of Abnormals and slashed three of them to bits. He ordered the recruits to keep on running, so I told them to follow me. When we saw the castle, the horses were already parked in the stables, and Bozé wasn’t with us. He and a bunch of recruits got devoured by the Abnormals, who just… went away, after that. At least, I didn’t see them make a run for the castle.”

Yelv isn’t silent for long.

“This bitch of a life isn’t made for new recruits.”

“Please”, Sharon continued. “You used to be a new recruit too. People gotta learn, and turns out there’s no better formation than field experience.”

Everyone knows her stance on death. She thinks the dead are losers. She isn’t part of this self-praising crowd, all these soldiers who flatter each other’s ego for their sacrifice for humanity. Sharon doesn’t care one bit for humanity, or so she says. She doesn’t have ties to anybody, she’s a heartless monster. She’s the Murderess.

There are many legends people spread about the Survey Corps. Captain Elma is an idol, revered by everyone for her abilities on the field, but off the field too. They all idolize her, although, in the end, working under her brings a whole new understanding of her personality. The Murderess is another one of these legends. The folks say that there’s a special group among the Corps. A group specifically trained by the legendary Captain, a group that could raise hell inside the Walls if they wanted to. A group of heartless, shameless monsters. One of them is called the Murderess. Sharon is proud of this title, she boasts it around more than her real name. She throws a glare in Mia and Yelv’s direction. Technically, they are part of that legendary group too…

“You’re still a bitch.”

“And you’re still yourself. Nobody’s perfect.”

“Don’t get mad at me!” Mia snickers after Yelv shot her an infuriated glare. “Grow yourself some thicker skin.”

After a short silence, during which Mia scraps her boots with her fingernails, Sharon talks again. Her tone of voice surprises both guards.

“Tomorrow… We’re heading back for the Walls. We’re close, so there’ll be more Titans.”

“… There will”, Mia adds pensively, as if prompting her to talk more.

“When that happens… If you see Hope… help her out, okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“Hope’s about to make the last mistake of her life if no one’s here to help her. So, take care of her for me. The formation… You’ll be closest to her when we’ll be making a run for our lives. Again. Just… Keep an eye on her.”

“Aren’t you gonna say please?” Yelv says breathlessly. No one laughs. Mia is on the verge of tears.

“Of course we’re gonna look after her!” She cries out all of a sudden, as if her feelings couldn’t be contained. “You didn’t even need to ask. Hope’s gonna make it, I swear it to you, Murderess.”

Sharon sports a confident smirk.

“She’ll have to.”

In the makeshift dormitory, Phog is the only one still awake. He can’t fall asleep. There is nothing to be done, nothing can replace the thoughts plaguing his mind. He has views, images, clear pictures in his head. Of the moment the outermost Wall crumbled, its entry pierced by the foot of a gigantic titan. Every sensation he has felt that day, the wind entering the city for the first time in one hundred years, the cries of the crowd running towards the innermost door, leading to the middle Wall. Thousands of people. He didn’t count, but he saw thousands of people crushed and devoured by the titans.

He wasn’t one of the first to run. He stayed back, at first. Paralyzed. He felt his feet leave the ground, but couldn’t explain it. Even when his brother’s voice reached his ears, he didn’t understand. Couldn’t understand. His brother was in his military uniform, and in tears. It was all vain. Uncontrollable. Out of reach. Their lives, their existences. It was all written. They were slaves to the Walls, and to the monsters lurking around it.

His brother quickly fell into this destructive mindset, not unlike the Wallists and their nonsensical conceptions of the world.

Phog takes a look around. In the obscurity, some silhouettes rise and fall calmly. Others are completely immobile. It does seem like he is the only one up, which doesn’t make him feel any better. To his left, snugly enveloped in her cape, is Alexa. He perceives her soft snoring, and he deems there’s no way he can wake her up. To his right, there’s Celica. He likes Celica. Celica isn’t loud, she isn’t hasty, she isn’t brutal. Celica is gentle and tough. She doesn’t yell, she doesn’t press him. When he struggles to find the words, she waits patiently. She never comments on it, but she also does not act like it’s not there.

But above all praise about her, Celica is brave. She’s brave in a selfless manner. She has a reason to fight, she has someone to protect. She isn’t on the field for some selfish revenge, or to prove herself. She chose to fight for someone else, and Phog wonders how it feels. To be dependable. Her features, they’re soft. A roundish face, full of childhood still. She’s younger than him, and she’s done so much more already.

She opens her eyes.

“What is it?” she inquires, her voice floats to his ears. “Can’t sleep?”

He shakes his head. Surely, no one will hear them talk, right?

“No.”

“Me neither.”

“What’s keeping you up?”

“My thoughts. And yours, too. Can’t rest when I know you’re like that.”

She’s compassionate and caring. She’s everything he wishes he could be.

“Don’t beat yourself up. What’s done is done. Frye won’t be mad.”

Oh. Right. That’s what’s plaguing his mind.

“I left them to die… All of them…”

“Not all of them. You helped me get back on my horse. You saved my life.”

“And then I ran aw-”

“ _We_ ran away. We ran because Squad Leader Bozé told us to. We ran because there was nothing else anyone could do.”

“If we had been stronger...”

She gives him some time, but he does not finish this thought.

“Ifs won’t change anything. Never have, never will”, she adds as she takes his hand in hers and squeezes it lightly. “Don’t take it all on yourself. I was there too, and I ran too.”

He shouldn’t feel better after hearing this, should he? Frye won’t be happy to learn he shied away from a fight, and even fled altogether. Yet, he sees Celica’s rationalizing. He understands it, if only partly. He rolls closer to his friend, taking her hand again and closing his eyes. Maybe he can force sleep to come.

And maybe he’ll feel better tomorrow.

* * *

The next day, Elma overlooks the city. The titans’ rampages inside the outermost Wall are a disheartening sight. The corpses behind her pile up like clothes during laundry day. Gruesome comparison. In a way.

She overlooks the teams running away and throws one last glance behind her, towards the horizon.  Her teams will reach the intermediate Wall sooner than they think, she feels. Her body feels very light. She is closer to the Sun, whose gleam caresses her cheeks like a cherished lover’s hand.

She wonders when they’ll all discover the truth. About the world. About her own identity. She wonders how they’ll react to it. She feels like an impostor. An outcast. A marginalized. Yet, they need her, more than they could ever imagine at this moment.

Beneath her feet, the Titans grab at the Wall like babies. To think… that much like her, they used to be humans. She turns around and faces the inner meadows. She’ll have to catch up with their lot, at some point. The excuse of buying them time, while promising to get back, sounds suspicious. Elma is aware of it. Nonetheless, she knows the time draws nigh. Soon, they’ll learn the truth. Maybe they’ll go easy on her once they know she used her power to protect them.

She shrugs to herself with a pointed sigh.  After fifteen minutes or so, she cannot see the battalion anymore. Surely, it has to mean they cannot see her either. So she walks forwards, until she can’t anymore, and lets herself fall. Like a fallen angel, her body glows bright, thunder strikes her from the heavens, and she turns into a monster.

She’ll see the end.

She’ll be the end.

**Author's Note:**

> Why this crossover?  
> -Because the composer for AOT and XCX is the same dude, Sawano. And when I listened to some AOT tracks, I thought, goddamn. They are so similar. Both universes also share this idea of exploring the unknown vastness, of protecting humanity against unfathomable threats and the idea that things are off. As if there were some hidden story you didn't know about. That's why I decided to write this.
> 
> So, now, onto little explanations:  
> -Murderess wanting Mia and Yelv to protect Hope is a reference to their post battle dialogue. After a battle with both Hope and Murderess in your team, Murderess calls Hope "princess" affectionately. Which is incredibly cute, coming from her. Hope being desperate is a hint to her story in XCX as well: girl went though some difficult stuff. Her adoptive father was killed, her best friend turned out to be evil and killed herself in front of her, and she's been fucked over by life in general.  
> -Irina's brother is alive in this story. Poor Leon never gets any mention in fics, so I decided to put him there. Of course, it's an XCX/AOT crossover. In a hypothetical followup to this story, he dies. Obviously. But, yeah, Leon is Gwin's best friend and is the reason Gwin even joined the army in XCX, so it felt right to have him there in this story (ala Eren conving Jean and co. to join the Survey Corps).  
> -Elma's emblem in her pocket is of course her lover's. The dead man we know close to nothing about. It's a hint to the time Levi cut out Petra's emblem from her jacket (and then gave it to his subordinates, pretending it was their friend's).  
> -Elma being a Titan Shifter is a way to reference her xenoform-ness. If you want, you can assume every alien in this story is actually a Titan Shifter (kind and protective Celica as well). It would make for some interesting interactions, if you ask me.  
> -The end and the title are from the AOT opening called "Red Swan".


End file.
